An apology to my adult daughter

Dearest daughter, I’m sorry for every time I’ve failed you. For neglecting to portray the consummate woman—aka wife, mother, sister, daughter, aunt, friend—or implying that level of excellence is even attainable. I’m sorry if you’ve questioned my love for you, or your worth as a human being. I’m sorry you’ve carried many of your heaviest burdens without me, and that I haven’t hugged you enough—or told you enough—how remarkable you are and the lavish ways you’ve enriched my life since you squawked your arrival. How you’ve taught me what a life free from pretense looks like filtered through the lens of unconditional forgiveness, compassion, acceptance and grit. Because of you, I desire to be a better person— “real people.” And I hope you grasp the goodness of your heart, the beauty of your wings and that the world needs what you have to offer. Thank you for the opportunity to try again each time I fall short. You bless me more than I deserve.

This too shall pass

[Image credit: Vlado]

I think the phrase This too shall pass requires an active, rather than a passive, approach.  For instance, my daughter’s change of residence (see Empty nests are for the birds) is not going as well as we’d hoped.  Granted, it’s only been five nights, but she’s spent 60 percent of those nights at “home,” in my nest.  Not that I’m complaining, but I know that wasn’t her intent when she made the decision to fly the coop.  I can’t be sure if she’ll be back, or if these are simply growing pains while she learns to spread her wings.  But without action, her circumstances will remain the same.  In other words, she can’t continue to keep one foot in each door indefinitely.  She either needs to stay put, confront her concerns and see if it works out.  Or she needs to accept that it’s not right for her.  Even if that means temporarily returning to the nest.

Do you believe this too shall pass with, or without effort?