And just like that: it’s a new year

Two days before Christmas, and all through the house (and workplace): I threw down a full-fledged menopausal meltdown. It was as if I’d been issued the challenge to: Go big, or go home. Eventually, I proceeded with both and dubbed myself the Grinch. But once I realized it was hormone related, I approached my muddled emotions with a clearer sense of direction. And that’s when I knew: my 20/20 vision and plans for “growth” aren’t about knocking out a bestseller (although at the top of my list) or greater financial stability (still up there), it’s about growing into the purpose for which I was created, and growing in the areas I mention in “…bidding farewell…”—my convictions, fortitude and peace. It’s about knowing who I am and growing in that knowledge, discovering and honing the tools I need to succeed. It’s about putting this season of all things menopause to work for me vs. against me. 2020, here I come!

How do you plan to grow this year?

If you knew you’d succeed, what would you do differently?

 

In my recent post, “Let go…,” I listed 10 things to release to be happy. What other baggage could we add to this list? The first thing that comes to mind is: envy. Oh, if we’d choose to find gratitude in our hearts for who we are right now. That instead of being critical over our perceived flaws or weaknesses, we would delight in our abilities, strengths and uniqueness. During a recent hike into the mountains, as I often do, I poured out a heavy heart within the solitude of the surrounding desert landscape. While I searched my soul, I left all my unmet expectations and disappointment, hurt and frustrations, right there on the trail. And walked away with this revelation: to change my situation (see #4 in aforementioned post) could simply mean that I change me. Not with the intent to please someone else, but with the hope that any self-improvement trickles into those lives around me.

What situation would you change if you knew you’d succeed?

Take the 30-day challenge

[Image credit: Stuart Miles]

I feel inspired. How can I not when it’s just days into a brand new year of possibilities? The studio where I practice Bikram yoga began a new challenge on Jan. 2. Our team leader has been passing along quotes and videos to encourage and inspire. One three-minute video* talks about trying something new for 30 days. The speaker suggests making small, sustainable changes in order to succeed. Last year, I had planned to write a book in 30 days but went about it all wrong and it didn’t happen. But if I apply small, sustainable changes in 2014, I only need to write 1,667 words daily for 30 days. What have you always meant to do or wanted to do but haven’t? Give up sweets or caffeine? Practice yoga? Ride your bike to work? Whatever it is, remember that the next 30 days will pass whether we like it or not. So I’m going to write a book.

What are you going to do for 30 days?

*http://www.ted.com/talks/matt_cutts_try_something_new_for_30_days.html?source=facebook#.UsV1bx-TMD9.facebook

Trust yourself

[Image credit: Stuart Miles]

The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.
~ Sylvia Plath

In my opinion, self-doubt is counterproductive to any cause.  Whether you’re writing a book, training for a marathon, participating in a Bikram challenge or hinging your hopes on Someday, once you allow doubt (a close relative of fear) to creep in, your enthusiasm and/or motivation tends to dwindle.  Has anyone ever questioned your intentions and then suddenly the idea or goal you were so excited about seemed silly or unattainable?  Or maybe you wanted to prove your naysayers wrong and ramped up your efforts.  Regardless, insecurity is not our friend because it poisons potential.  Instead, we need to be overcomers in order to transform self-doubt into self-confidence.  We’re the only ones who know how badly we want something.  So we’re the only ones who can determine what it will take to push through the uncertainties and come out ahead.  Trust yourself.  It’s better to fail than never to try.

What is your worst enemy to succeeding in life?

Over the hump

[Image credit: Photokanok]

Eighteen days ago I started the 30-day Bikram challenge (see All or nothing revisited), which also included making a few self-prescribed diet changes.  A lot of commitment all at one time.  So much so that, in order to maintain my focus (and my sanity), I’ve temporarily stopped working out at the gym, writing my book, keeping up with my daily chores and making any big or life-altering decisions.  These allowances have permitted me to successfully practice self-control, while at the same time nurture myself physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  I can thank Yoga, along with the changes I’ve made, for growing me in these areas and teaching me that I’m stronger than I ever knew.  And now that I’m over the hump with less than two weeks to go, I’m beginning to think about life after the challenge.   It looks like this: I will succeed at whatever I set my mind to.

What kind of goal have you established for yourself that required making it over the hump?

All or nothing revisited

[Image credit: Stuart Miles]

Last week I accepted a 30-day hot Yoga challenge.  In addition to attending practice each day for 30 days, I omitted a few things from my diet (caffeine, alcohol and sweets).  Plus, I went vegan.  It may sound like I tackled too much at one time, especially since 30 days of Bikram is already quite a test.  However, I tend to be an all or nothing kind of girl.  That doesn’t mean I would quit the challenge if I indulged in a cup of coffee.  I simply desire to get the most out of the full 30 days.  Which means it also gives me greater impetus to succeed.  Add in a three-hour trip to the dentist for oral surgery only four days in, and I really should be a basket case.  Instead, I’m feeling better than ever, both physically and mentally.  And the discipline I’m practicing can be used long after the month is over.

If you can’t give something your all, do you choose to do nothing?

Give it up

[Image credit: photostock]

To gain that which is worth having,
it may be necessary to lose everything else. ~ Bernadette Devlin

A close friend of mine has invested a lot of money.  She’s sacrificed relationships and her health, time with family.  She’s forfeited sleep, fought the good fight and hit pretty darn close to rock bottom in some people’s estimation.  But she is gaining that which is worth having … to her.  I’m a bit envious because I don’t know that I have what it takes to lose everything in order to gain that which is worth having … to me.  I recently watched a YouTube video about how success is synonymous to breathing.  That you have to want to succeed as much as you want to breathe.  In other words, do you need whatever it is in order to live?  Because if you do, you must be willing to sacrifice everything you hold dear.

Would you be willing to lose everything, in order to gain that which is worth having?

Laying a solid foundation

[Image credit: Worakit Sirijinda]

I’m pretty excited about how things are going on-the-job.  Last week my boss took me out to lunch to celebrate my six-month anniversary and discuss my position, as well as his ideas for expanding it.  We talked about the potential for me to write for one of our construction publications, something that both thrills me and causes a bundle of nerves to snake up my spine.  After all, I write pieces for a beauty and lifestyle magazine relating to body image, spider veins and migraine relief.  What do I know about the construction industry beyond the copy I read during the editing process?  I was discussing this very thing with a spin-class buddy who didn’t skip a beat when he pointed out that construction and beauty have a lot in common — starting with a solid foundation.  And I realized that’s the way it is with most things in order to succeed; i.e., relationships, fitness regimens, education, careers, etc.  Whatever your desired outcome, it’s definitely worth the effort to lay the groundwork first.  I can hardly wait to get started.

What would you say is your most solid foundation in life?

I’m working on it

[Image credit: Stuart Miles]

One of my goals for this year is to improve myself by breaking a bad habit.  The good news: at any given time, I have several to choose from.  The bad news: at any given time, I have several to choose from.  With so many areas of my life I’d like to improve upon, you could say I’m in a constant state of flux.  This isn’t so bad unless I become overwhelmed with all the changes I’m attempting to enforce, like working on being more spontaneous, speaking up, making better choices (and then not complaining or regretting the ones I do make), improving my body image, being more timely — to name a few.  But I notice that when I try to work on too many modifications at once, my common MO is to shut down and withdraw.  It seems easier to just talk the talk and forget about the walking part.  Not to mention, it sometimes leads to those unpleasant funks.  To keep on track, I need to focus on one thing at a time, and then pat myself on the back when I succeed.  After all, it’s not like anyone else is keeping score.

What’s one thing you’re working on to improve yourself this year?