Putting on my big girl panties

It’s not working. The path to my purpose, plan and joy; living in the ‘ah-ha’ moment; circumnavigating discontent; creating my own luck (and balance)… you name it: Just. Not. Happening. And I’m a broken record when it comes to the things in my life I’m unwilling to change in the first place. My sweet friend, Joan, said, Maybe you just can’t [do anything about it] right now. You’ve got lots of stuff going on… You’ll come out of this… then you’ll fix what ails you, a little at a time. She reminded me it’s all about baby steps. Yet, even indecision is a decision. So for now I’ve decided to flounder a bit, “cut myself slack” and indulge in a little selfishness—with my time and energies. To heck with the big girl panties. It’s time for me to stock up on chocolate, wine and paperbacks, and to stop waiting for Someday to arrive in order to start rocking my tutu Today.

How will you live out Today?

Image courtesy of DealDash’s Photos.

Making it a habit

[Image credit: Salvatore Vuono]

In Addressing the hard stuff, we focused on the reason(s) why we might possess a certain character flaw.  As we acknowledged, not all habits are detrimental (like my inability to consistently practice punctuality).  But if we take the “icky” labeled selfishness or low self-esteem and work at consciously recognizing when we exhibit these traits, hopefully it will lead to a positive substitute.  In other words: replacing the bad habit with a good one.  For example, if selfishness rears its ugly head when we don’t get our way, perhaps it’s possible to look for a compromise which benefits both parties.  Or, if our sense of worth or identity is threatened, we might voice our concerns at the time instead of stuffing in our feelings or making counterproductive choices.  According to experts, a habit takes at least 21 days to form, good or bad.  Three weeks is nothing to improve ourselves; are you with me?

Is there a positive habit you need to start working on today?

What goes around comes around

[Image credit: zirconicrusso]

In my posts Getting to the root of it all and Regaining your balance, I ramble about addressing our own set of “ickies” — the imperfections each of us struggle with on a regular basis.  Over the past week, I’ve begun the arduous first step: pinpointing a few of my own deep-seated character flaws.  My habitual tardiness is a trait I’m not proud of; however, it is just that: a bad habit that typically doesn’t harm anyone else (and one I continually attempt to improve upon).  But the other ones — shortcomings that can’t help but hold me back from the person I strive to be — may also hurt others in the process.  Selfishness, for example, is self-serving, benefiting no one but myself.  But if I’m truly honest, even that is questionable when my actions so often backfire and bite me in the butt — to the point of altering the course of my Someday and possibly yours.  Perhaps this is true poetic justice.

Are your “ickies” exclusive, or do they affect others, as well?

Regaining your balance

[Image credit: ponsuwan]

It can be a rude awakening when the rug is suddenly pulled out from under you.  It can shatter that vulnerable part of you, the side of you who lives transparently and trusts fully.  You may be left with shattered hopes and dreams, as well as feelings of stupidity, betrayal, confusion or worse.  Perhaps the hardest thing isn’t the brokenness, but that you’re forced to take a good hard look at yourself.  And you may conduct an honest assessment of your entire belief system and discover you don’t like what you see.  There may be skeletons lurking under the surface called selfishness or greed.  However, instead of dealing with them, you might be tempted to stuff them into the back of your closet and ignore them.  Of course, overlooking these “ickies” will not make them go away.  But once you address them, you can right yourself and begin to regain your balance.

How do you regain your balance when the rug is pulled out from under you?