My future self: here’s the skinny

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

In a couple recent posts, I mention a new writing venture. As many readers know, I’m an aspiring published novelist. Although I’ve authored numerous online and print articles, I’ve always dreamed and talked about writing and publishing books. Since graduating with my B.A. in literature, writing and film from ASU in 2010, I’ve invested time and finances toward countless writing conferences, workshops, writing and critique groups, as well as books and courses focusing on all things craft-related. Yet, I’ve used every excuse—and, quite honestly, played the blame game—as to why I “still” haven’t written my book. But 2020 is different (on myriad levels!). During a self-improvement program I’m taking, participants were challenged to officially share our “future selves” with three people—so I figured why not hundreds more? Here’s the skinny: I hired a writing coach. I’m learning about limiting beliefs and taking a big leap. And I’ve written 45,000+ words toward a 60K manuscript and my future published novelist self.

Who is your future self?

 

You are not defined by your past: stay rooted in the present

 

When you start to make the right decisions and pieces of your life begin to fall into place (see Falling into place… ): beware. This is also when the curve balls (may) start to fly. At least that’s been my experience over the past several weeks. And I don’t believe it’s a coincidence that every time I think I’ve got my bases covered, certain issues continue to bubble to the surface, threatening to define me and, in turn, undermine progress I’ve made in the areas of self-improvement, relational growth and my vocational aspirations. Here’s the scoop: When you’re assaulted with reminders of your past failures, know that you are not the sum of your mistakes, your poor choices or the number of times you’ve been struck out. In fact, each time you replay your past creates a stumbling block—and hinders present and future growth. Don’t allow the past to rob you of today. You’re an MVP: start believing it.

How do you stay rooted in the present?

Photo courtesy of amenic181 at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Change your thought patterns, change your life

 

In my recent post, “Be a miracle worker…,” I list a few examples of what self-improvement might look like, and I introduce a need to focus on my personal growth. For me, this means making changes to my everyday approach to life, including a radical shift in my thought patterns. Plus, I must look at the long-term with an open mind. These aren’t new epiphanies yet, during a recent hike, they materialized in a more profound way. Every several hundred feet, I’d look up from the rock-strewn path to the cerulean skies above. The mountaintops towered over me, reminders of how tiny I am… the fragility of life. And that instead of lamenting the stumbling blocks and detours on my journey, it’s essential to express gratitude for my daily blessings. When we shift our gaze on the things we’re thankful for, we have less time to “see” the disappointments. And sometimes what we think we want is nothing compared to what awaits.

What thought pattern can you change?

Be a miracle worker: start with yourself first

What lies before us and what lies behind us
are small matters compared to what lies within us.
And when you bring what is within out into
the world, miracles happen.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Self-improvement: this term conjures up a bevy of images. To some, it might mean a healthier lifestyle by logging in extra Zzzzs each night or increasing water intake throughout the day. For others it could look like volunteering for the soup kitchen, learning a new skill, pursuing a creative outlet or taking online classes. There is no set formula for improving oneself. And, thankfully, it’s a lifelong process. For too many years, I played the part of victim (see #4 in my post “Let go…”)—complaining because nothing changed in a particular situation. But I realize that, in order for miracles to happen, I must change myself: First, by concentrating on my personal growth. And second, by being receptive to what lies ahead.

What area(s) can you improve upon to make miracles happen?

 

If you knew you’d succeed, what would you do differently?

 

In my recent post, “Let go…,” I listed 10 things to release to be happy. What other baggage could we add to this list? The first thing that comes to mind is: envy. Oh, if we’d choose to find gratitude in our hearts for who we are right now. That instead of being critical over our perceived flaws or weaknesses, we would delight in our abilities, strengths and uniqueness. During a recent hike into the mountains, as I often do, I poured out a heavy heart within the solitude of the surrounding desert landscape. While I searched my soul, I left all my unmet expectations and disappointment, hurt and frustrations, right there on the trail. And walked away with this revelation: to change my situation (see #4 in aforementioned post) could simply mean that I change me. Not with the intent to please someone else, but with the hope that any self-improvement trickles into those lives around me.

What situation would you change if you knew you’d succeed?