Armed enough to be dangerous: when knowledge affords the upper hand

 

In a recent post—“A new way to approach the New Year…”—I talk about exercising kindness to self by managing my health. Along that vein (pun intended), I donated my blood to science (okay, not exactly) and learned that I share a familial gene mutation. Although my heart sunk when I viewed my results, I did not awaken one day with this disorder; as with my heart defect (BAV), I’ve lived with Factor 5 Leiden every day for 50 <cough cough> something years. I just didn’t expect to see the big fat “F,” so to speak, glaring at me from the online healthcare portal. In non-doctor speak, the diagnosis simply means I may be prone to developing blood clots. But the funny thing: I’m grateful. I am able to arm myself with knowledge about my genetic makeup which, in turn, allows me to exercise better care for my health. Ignorance might be bliss, but it will not save my life.

How do you exercise kindness to self?

How to jump start your day: a quest for the Holy Grail

Fantasy: I am so excited to begin each day that I jump out of bed in the mornings. Reality: I silence the alarm, squint at my cellphone and weep a little on the inside when I realize it’s time to get up. As much as I like my day job, what I’d like even more is to find that reason to jump out of bed in the mornings. Yes, I’m grateful, thankful, blessed—which the wooden sign hanging over my kitchen window calls out to those who enter the room. But aside from my morning coffee, there’s very little that excites me about the ritual I perform once I’m awake. This past weekend, however, I broke free from my daily routine and enjoyed a mini getaway up north. I’m convinced this deviation from my everyday agenda is the Holy Grail required to jump start my days. Mission: Figure out how to make it work Monday through Friday.

What gets you excited to jump out of bed each morning?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Be a wo(man) on a mission: gratitude with intention

 

Since I misplaced my mojo (see “Don’t let anything dull your sparkle…”), I’ve been on a mission to get “unstuck.” For the past few posts, now, I’ve talked about how I’m rebooting my mojo—by recommitting to a mantra, challenging myself (again) and changing the rules. Here’s another tip I’ve begun to employ: gratitude with intention. On Jan. 1, I opened a brand new journal I received from my BFF, as well as a book of 365+ gratitude prompts a dear friend gifted me for my last birthday. Thus began a daily look at my life through the lens of gratefulness. Unfortunately, just like any routine, over time this practice started to become stale and simply something to check off my to-do list. However, once I took on the mission of locating my missing mojo, I began to approach my morning journaling sessions with intention vs. habit. This has also spilled into my everyday life—through tiny attitude adjustments that make a world of difference.

What’s your mission?

Got faith? Your story isn’t over yet.

On any given weekend over the past several months, I’ve hung my “closed” sign, packed my bags and driven up north. Each time, these getaways prove a source of inspiration and a form of self-care. Opportunities to refresh from “the grind,” to rediscover and reconnect with who I am—a faith-filled wife, mother, sister, employee, friend, writer, yogi, hiker and dreamer. And what I desire out of this one life—simple pleasures like that first sip of liquid magic in the mornings before the sun makes its ascent; autumn’s burst of vibrant color; raw, belly laughter; music and books that stir my soul; a connection between two hearts. To be a light in the world. To make a difference. Yet even if a lone tear slips from my eye when plans fail, I still choose to be grateful, knowing it’s simply part of my story. One that’s not over yet. After all, when our faith is tested, our endurance earns a chance to grow.

How’s your faith life?

Always in style: Happiness looks good on you

After a recent acupuncture and cosmetic facial rejuvenation session, my practitioner regarded me and said, “Happiness looks good on you.” It didn’t matter that I wore my grungiest romper or that my messy bun hung askew, or that my mascara had long since washed away by the time my appointment rolled around. Nor did it hinge on my bi-monthly facial treatments (although if you ask me about my healthy glow, I’m happy to hook you up). The happiness she referred to—the byproduct of a grateful heart—is a mindful choice that I slip into daily as part of my morning ritual (usually as I savor my first cup of freshly brewed magic). At times, however, the sparkle dims: I might be tired, frustrated or cranky. But once I accept that happiness is not grounded on the external, I empower my inner beauty to radiate outward. Happiness is that one-size-fits-all, must-have accessory that never goes out of style and looks good year-round.

How does happiness look on you?

 

10 ways you’re making your life harder than it has to be: reposted (+ 10 ways to turn it around)

 

This is it in a nutshell: https://thoughtcatalog.com/tim-hoch/2014/06/10-ways-youre-making-your-life-harder-than-it-has-to-be/. Plus 10 quick tips on how to make life easier (repeat after me):

• When we continue to rehash (supposed) offenses: Let it go.
• When we look for affirmation from others: I’m enough.
• When our worries escalate to panic-attack proportions: It’s temporary.
• If unrealistic/uncommunicated expectations eclipse our blessings: Be grateful.
• Sometimes we pray, sometimes we wait but we must always do our homework: Be wise.
• It’s okay to be picky and/or less bold when taking risks: Failure is better than not trying at all.
• The truth on comparison shopping: The grass is not greener.
• We cannot retrieve time we’ve lost or fast forward to the future: Practice mindfulness daily.
• Let go of [fill in the blank]: Focus on what we can control.
• About giving back: In the end it’s not the years in your life that count; it’s the life in your years. ~ Abraham Lincoln.

How do you make life easier?

Photo courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

How to excel at this one life

Many self-help articles share a common theme on how to grow and excel at this one life: stop complaining. This doesn’t mean we can’t vent our frustrations, but how about a new approach? Rather than spew negativity to those around us, let’s try writing it down; i.e., spend a few minutes daily journaling our angst. Maybe your partner behaved inconsiderately or you forgot to fill up your gas tank for the week. Or perhaps the first work email of the day rubbed you the wrong way or your alarm went off much too early this morning (it can’t be Monday already, can it?) and your stomach is in knots—knowing that after an eight-hour day, a 2 ½-hour HOA board meeting follows. Once you’ve written everything down, release these thoughts and mindfully replace them with thankfulness: It’s a new day. You’re breathing. Friday’s coming. Everything is temporary. Most on-point quote (by Heraclitus): There is nothing permanent except change. #truestory

Is your MO to complain or to be grateful?

Image courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Listen up: bridge the communication gap

Several years ago, I wrote about how ‘When only up close and personal will do’ in cases where instant communication doesn’t do the trick. I find myself in that spot again, torn into a million tiny pieces because I cannot be with several loved ones going through their own challenges—health, relationships, financial, employment or otherwise. But I can, at least, carve time into my daily routine each morning to offer up prayers and petitions for these dear people in my life, grateful for every one of them. And I hope this affords them a semblance of peace amidst whatever chaos they struggle with. To be kind in word and deed to those in my little world is a blessing I cherish; yet, when I’m unable to offer a touch, a helping hand, words to make it right or a shoulder to cry on, I can listen—whether I’m in the same room, or halfway across the country. Sometimes that’s enough.

How do you bridge the communication gap?

Image courtesy of chanpipat at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

A rebirth of sorts: happiness at last

As the year draws to a close, and as I grasp tightly (kicking and screaming) the vestiges of my forties for a few days longer, I reflect on that for which I’m grateful: Those friends who have come and gone from my life—the ones who bless me daily, and those who served the sole purpose of teaching me (sometimes painful) lessons; the second chances I’ve been gifted, a new path to traverse—a clean slate, if you will. I’m energized by the possibilities, my heart lighter than ever. And as I step into this new season, I can honestly say I’ve discovered what I’ve been searching for all this time. The funny thing is it’s been right under my nose all along. Because when I finally stopped focusing on me—my needs, my expectations, my self—I understood for the first time what it means to be happy. So happy rebirthday to me… a fresh beginning to sparkle where I’m planted.

Where could you use a rebirth?

Image courtesy of Nongkran_ch at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

A palms-up approach

[Image credit: tungphoto]

It’s true what they say. Time seems to speed up as we get older. We’re already well into the holiday season and next week is December. Pretty soon the New Year will be in full swing and 2014 a distant memory. As I prepare for another Thanksgiving, I find myself pondering those things in my life—people, events, successes—for which I’m grateful, but also looking ahead to 2015. Once again, while in yoga the other day, the instructor advised we live with our palms open, releasing our expectations to avoid disappointment and to better live in the present. Yet my goals are still a work in progress. Without some kind of expectation in place, it would be harder to measure how far we’ve traveled in 365 days and where we need to make [micro]adjustments. This doesn’t mean we can’t keep our palms open—in generosity and thanksgiving—as we await the surprises the New Year has in store for us.

Are you a planner or a seat-of-the-pantser?