If you have to ask yourself if it’s wrong: it’s wrong

A while back, a friend was wrestling with a right-or-wrong type of decision and praying for discernment. My response: If you have to ask if it’s wrong, then it’s wrong. That same sentiment popped up recently in a Christian women’s group I recently joined. Yet, even those not grounded in Biblical principles know that our intuition—polished over the years through trials and triumphs—offers a decent gauge as far as “gut feelings.” I believe it serves as a warning bell alerting us to booby traps ready to easily derail if we’re not on guard. Or, perhaps we’ve chosen to ignore the flashing lights, only to plunge headfirst into the unknown, regardless. Sure we could end up unscathed. But we also might find ourselves so off track that it takes months—or years—to regain solid ground while we mend the superficial scratches or tend to deeper wounds. Seek that still small voice today. Stay the course. The race has only begun.

What decision are you wrestling with?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Asking the big question: what’s next?

 

Pivotal moments. We all experience those times in our lives where we can usually pinpoint at least one life-altering decision, milestone or epiphany. I’ve written a lot about a big one for me: my daughter had just started 10th grade and, when I realized she’d graduate in two years, I knew I didn’t want to do what I was doing for the rest of my life. Twenty-four months later I earned my B.A., just a day before this same child received her diploma. Fast forward a half dozen years: my daughter turns 24 today. I work in an industry I’m passionate about (most of the time) but, once again, I can’t say this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. Maybe it’s because hitting the half-century mark this past December signaled another turning point—an ah-ha moment of sorts. We aren’t getting out of this thing alive, and it isn’t slowing down. So what’s next?

What is a pivotal moment in your life?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Fear is *not* a favorite F word

Fear can be debilitating. Fear of… failure, the unknown, change, making a mistake, saying the wrong thing, getting hurt, causing pain, running out of time, missing out. Regret. The other day, I made a decision, set my plan in motion and, for several hours, I felt at peace about it. Only, when it came time to execute ‘said’ plan, fear seized and held me captive, resulting in an aborted mission. The solution? I must confront my fears, head on, instead of running away from whatever situation I’m facing. Otherwise, I will never be able to make peace with the past and move forward into the present that’s waiting for me to delight in. But this requires courage that I have yet to access, and confidence to trust in the process. It also requires daily positive affirmations that, indeed, I am good enough. And keep in mind: There are no mistakes. Just life lessons. So that’s one fear we can all say goodbye to.

What is your biggest fear?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Putting on my big girl panties

It’s not working. The path to my purpose, plan and joy; living in the ‘ah-ha’ moment; circumnavigating discontent; creating my own luck (and balance)… you name it: Just. Not. Happening. And I’m a broken record when it comes to the things in my life I’m unwilling to change in the first place. My sweet friend, Joan, said, Maybe you just can’t [do anything about it] right now. You’ve got lots of stuff going on… You’ll come out of this… then you’ll fix what ails you, a little at a time. She reminded me it’s all about baby steps. Yet, even indecision is a decision. So for now I’ve decided to flounder a bit, “cut myself slack” and indulge in a little selfishness—with my time and energies. To heck with the big girl panties. It’s time for me to stock up on chocolate, wine and paperbacks, and to stop waiting for Someday to arrive in order to start rocking my tutu Today.

How will you live out Today?

Image courtesy of DealDash’s Photos.

Great accomplishments begin here

[Image credit: Stuart Miles]

The greatest accomplishment began as a decision
once made and often a difficult one. ~ Michael Rawls

Recently I decided I want to pursue my master’s degree. I’ve attended seminars, ordered study materials, created a timeline, charted my plan and begun the prep work to apply. Only I still don’t know what I’m doing. One program offers a teaching assistantship and doesn’t require standardized testing. Another focuses on composition and rhetoric (my passion!), which means countless hours of study time between now and test day, my funding uncertain. There are people to meet—it’s *who* you know, not what you know—and events to join. Half the time my mind is filled with more questions than answers and I wonder how I’ll find room to add one more vocabulary definition. Or find time for one more meeting or to study for one more hour. It always begins with a decision, however. To make it happen, or find an excuse to look the other way.

What’s your greatest accomplishment?

Flirting with freedom

 

The term freedom stirs up multiple meanings. In the case of my cat, although he lives a charmed life, I imagine he still yearns for life “on the wild side.” Or at least a fleeting taste of life outside the confines of our yard. A student on break finds a brief reprieve from tests and papers due. When on vacation, deadlines and everyday responsibilities temporarily cease. How rare to be afforded a chance to not just flirt with freedom, but to test drive it. Freedom from fear, from debt, from a relationship or job no longer serving its purpose, from illness or whatever it is that limits our potential—before making a life-changing decision. If we were only guaranteed success, wholeness, satisfaction, a cure. But we aren’t, so we remain in our own yard and never see what’s on the other side of the gate. One day we may gather the courage to open it and walk through to the other side.

What do you desire freedom from?