When life is spinning out of control: what we CAN control

One day you’re anticipating a new decade ripe with possibility. Big things—good things—finally appear within your grasp. But then: boom! Life as you know it: kaput. Unless you’ve remained sequestered from #allthethings, you realize this is your new normal. As a human being, compassion toward the collective face of humanity—splashed across myriad news reports and social media feeds—proves a concerted effort at times. As a Believer, the status quo tests my faith. Yet, after I wade through my battered emotions, I acknowledge a call to action: to reprioritize. To re-evaluate my direction. To shift my focus from the race and to grasp onto the one thing—literally!—within my control: what I can do this moment.

1. Pray… continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17)
2. Connect… with friends/family/neighbors/support groups via social distancing/texting/calling/emailing/FaceTiming
3. Appreciate… every blessing
4. Extend… love/kindness/help/laughter/smiles/forgiveness/encouragement/grace
5. Begin… a new project/book/craft/online course/wellness program/etc.
6. Breathe… and be present

Feel free to add to my list… and reach out anytime through my contact page.

An apology to my adult daughter

Dearest daughter, I’m sorry for every time I’ve failed you. For neglecting to portray the consummate woman—aka wife, mother, sister, daughter, aunt, friend—or implying that level of excellence is even attainable. I’m sorry if you’ve questioned my love for you, or your worth as a human being. I’m sorry you’ve carried many of your heaviest burdens without me, and that I haven’t hugged you enough—or told you enough—how remarkable you are and the lavish ways you’ve enriched my life since you squawked your arrival. How you’ve taught me what a life free from pretense looks like filtered through the lens of unconditional forgiveness, compassion, acceptance and grit. Because of you, I desire to be a better person— “real people.” And I hope you grasp the goodness of your heart, the beauty of your wings and that the world needs what you have to offer. Thank you for the opportunity to try again each time I fall short. You bless me more than I deserve.

Transformative change: finding comfort in your own skin

On the topic of changing one’s mind (see “It’s okay to begin again…”), there’s a word for that which also encompasses changing one’s heart, self or way of life. According to Merriam-Webster, metanoia is a “transformative change of heart especially: a spiritual conversion.” I like to think it’s validation of where I find myself these days—in part due to the mindfulness journey I embarked on more than two months ago. As a daily exercise between conscious thought and a willing spirit, I’m drawn to life’s simpler things and able to find joy within both the hills and the valleys. Not only has my heart softened toward those closest to me and to the plight of the human condition, but I feel a richer compassion for myself. Although unsure of my next step, I’m okay with that because I’m moving forward. And, for the first time—maybe ever—I’m comfortable in my own skin. Perhaps Club 50 is “the new metanoia.” 

What recent transformative change have you experienced?

 

7 tips to incorporate mindfulness into your day

If you want to conquer the anxiety of life,
live in the moment, live in the breath. ~ Amit Ray

In my post, “A month of mindfulness…,” I share how I’ve begun to practice mindfulness—the act of consciously directing my awareness, without judgment—moment by moment. I also include a few examples of where I’ve begun to pay attention on purpose. Here are seven tips on how you might incorporate mindfulness into your everyday routine: 1) Choose a better-for-you beverage or snack option. 2) Focus on your breath when you’re uncomfortable, scared or upset. 3) Give other speakers 100 percent of your attention. 4) Notice if you exhibit behaviors like jumping to conclusions or overreacting, interrupting or responding with rudeness. 5) Look for ways to extend compassion and kindness to those around you. 6) Replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations—before you “think aloud.” 7) Pause before you speak/email/text. Bonus: Always remember it’s a practice. Then watch the changes start to unfold.

How do you practice mindfulness?

Photo courtesy of David Castillo at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Be the change

Many of us are familiar with the saying: Be the change you wish to see in your world. It coincides with my Dress for success post because, if you want (more of) something, you seek to attract that very thing. Consequently, if you want more love in your life, be more loving. If you want more peace, be more peaceful. If you want to see more compassion from others, you’ll be more compassionate. Feeling misunderstood? Be more understanding. So often it is another person we wish to change, but we may as well beat our heads against a brick wall for the good that will do. If we can only change ourselves and our circumstances, then it is up to each of us to become magnets for the change we desire within our small frames of influence. The more we focus on being what we want, the more we’ll bring about lasting, positive transformation in and around us.

What change do you wish to experience in your life?

[Image credit Stuart Miles and freedigitalphotos.net]