We see what we expect to see

 

I consider myself a student—not of any university or trade school, but an everyday learner—whether out and about in public, in front of my laptop or with a book in hand. As for reading, not only do I read for pleasure, but also to study the writing craft. While recently perusing* The Writer magazine, I ran across an article titled “Dig in” about the relationship between editor and writer. Within 1,200 words or so, I experienced absolution of every typo I’ve missed during the editing and/or writing process, every omitted detail or similar faux pas. About any shoddy copy edits I’ve been asked in the past—Were you sleeping? How did that happen?—the author reminds: “We see what we expect to see.” The article also speaks upon digging deeper to become better (writers and editors), and highly recommends a second pair of eyes. Oh, and that oftentimes we just need that extra push.

When could you use backup?

*[read: pursuing in the first few drafts.]

Image courtesy of hyena reality at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Forgiveness leads to freedom

[Image credit:bigjom]

My daughter is one of the most forgiving people I know, and just as easily can forget.  I am freely able to request it for myself, but offering pardon to someone else is another story.  Although, since losing a friendship, as well as addressing some of my less than desirable character traits, I understand that in order to fully pick up the pieces and move past this moment in time, I must do some forgiving of my own (even of myself).  When we feel wronged or slighted, however, it’s challenging to 1) own up to our part in the tango (it takes two, remember?) and 2) offer absolution (especially when it hasn’t been sought).  But I’ve found it’s truly the only way to “let it go” and, in the process, find freedom.  Freedom to give our dreams that facelift I talk about in The changing face of our dreams, freedom to finally forget the heartache or freedom simply to start over.

Is it easier for you to forgive or to forget?

Surviving the tough decisions

[Image credit: anankklm]

In my post Nothing ventured, nothing gained, I talked about a particular situation where the outcome was not solely in my control.  However, a couple of days ago I received direction loud and clear in the confines of one or two sentences spoken between friends.  This resulted in the absolution of a figurative pinky promise and a mutual dream … for now.  After following through with my decision, I’ve admittedly experienced a heap of warring emotions: remorse, disappointment, sadness and failure, as well as a double dose of second guesses.  If not for my resolve to do the right thing, I may be stricken with grief, as well.   But if I peel back the layers and closely examine the myriad feelings, I just might also detect a small amount of relief on both sides of the equation.  At this point in time, it’s this latter emotion I must passionately cling to in order to move forward with my heart intact.

What is your secret to surviving the tough decisions?