The trick is to remember

Ever get excited about a vacation day but little transpires as planned? That was me yesterday. Often, it’s a wonder I manage to get myself to work each morning by 7 a.m., show up at the gym or yoga studio nine hours later and then crawl into bed by 8:30 at night. And sometimes cook, clean and do my volunteer thing. Especially after a month packed with deadline upon deadline, as well as the one-year anniversary of my pop’s death, losing a beloved feline, vandalism of my daughter’s vehicle, a broken clothes dryer, infestation of ants and another kitty struggling post-surgery. I arrived at that point where, if I didn’t take the day off, I’d pack my bags and hightail it across country. Only my day off went from bad to worse—until sometime around the eleventh hour, it started to look up. And I was reminded of that very thing: whatever we’re going through is temporary. The trick is remembering.

How do you remember it’s just temporary?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

To wait, or to anticipate?

Since my last post, “The answer might be to wait,” I have been doing just that: waiting. But not sitting idly as the world passes me by. I continue to keep my mind and body active and to carve out time to do what makes me happy. And I’ve learned a few things about myself in the process: 1) I am able to find an extra nine hours in a week if I really want to, because it’s a matter of ‘making’ the time. 2) I might be fickle in a few areas of my life, but I know what I want and where I want to go. Now I need to discover the right path to get there. However, maybe it’s those unexpected twists and turns that create the journey that is mine alone. And 3) I am stronger than I thought I was [read: conquered my first five-minute plank]. Perhaps it’s not waiting, after all, but anticipating better things to come.

Are you waiting, or anticipating?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

An amazing life

I spent the past 31 days reciting a positive affirmation each morning. I practice Bikram yoga, attend church, volunteer my time, share laughter with friends and family, work in a field I’m passionate about and engage in fulfilling hobbies. I wake up every day and choose happiness, yet I seem to be missing something. Through Family Share and its 15 steps to ensure an amazing life, however, I discovered a few missing links.

1. Connect with yourself and others
2. Live in the present
3. Always create
4. Cultivate an “attitude of gratitude”
5. Choose a mentor wisely
6. Give your body the gift of rest and relaxation
7. Eat for happiness (skip processed foods, enjoy healthy fats)
8. Cleanse your body
9. Cleanse your mind
10. Cleanse your spirit
11. Establish healthy boundaries
12. Let go of anything that doesn’t serve you
13. Set SMART goals (specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, timely)
14. It’s a practice, not a perfect
15. Help others

Where do you miss the mark?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Rediscovering our personal truths

This week while I wrapped up a work project, I rediscovered six personal truths that make me tick: 1) I do what I love. If I ever again must be reminded of the answer to the question, ‘Am I in the right field, career-wise?’ I need only recall the Adrenalin rush I experience each time I write. Now I want more. 2) I practice self-love. Self-love and cutting ourselves slack don’t necessarily mean the same thing. A glass of wine to relax, yes; chased by frosted Saltine crackers to de-stress, no. 3) The perfect time to start something never arrives. I am ready to take the next step toward living Today. 4) No (wo)man is an island. I desire to fellowship with others, to encourage and share accountability. And my editor usually knows best. 5) Better late than never. All good things take time. But deadlines are still important. 6) I am good enough. Yet there will always be room for improvement.

What personal truths have you rediscovered?

Image courtesy of winnond at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Stretching, bending our muscle memory

Part of living my life ‘Today’ includes doing things that displace me from my comfort zone. For example, on a recent routine pizza/movie night, I opted, instead, for dinner at a new venue, followed by musical entertainment—which resulted in unexpected, albeit pleasant surprises. One morning I attended a ‘silent’ yoga class, allowing me to focus on my breath and my thoughts without distraction; another day I practiced in the second row where my image is blurrier and it’s harder to pinpoint those areas I might otherwise judge or become preoccupied with. Rather, I concentrated on the big picture—how my body felt and how that translated to my reflection in the mirror. And by saying ‘yes’ to a friend’s spontaneous invitation to the movies, I met five new incredible ladies. When we try fresh things that challenge our norm, we stretch and bend our muscle memory and develop into more flexible individuals, whether inside or outside of the hot room.

What new thing recently challenged your norm?

 

Image courtesy of ponsuwan at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

It’s just the beginning

At some point you need to take your life into your own hands. And make your own decisions. Start living the life you want now. Texted to me from a friend after listening to the broken record of my life again, I read these words nestled between a bit of well-deserved derision, and then returned to my safety net (see “Habits are choices…”). As expected, I woke up puffy and sad, no closer to any resolution. Except at some point I need to take my life into my own hands. And make my own decisions. And start living the life I want now. Not tomorrow. Not Someday. Today. This means committing to a few tough choices, making mistakes, disappointing people, feeling discomfort instead of stuffing it. And forgiving myself for waiting so long. Because my heart is heavy, burdened, by conforming to a life that no longer fits—the caterpillar who believes her world is over. Yet it’s only beginning.

Is this the life you want to live?

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Putting on my big girl panties

It’s not working. The path to my purpose, plan and joy; living in the ‘ah-ha’ moment; circumnavigating discontent; creating my own luck (and balance)… you name it: Just. Not. Happening. And I’m a broken record when it comes to the things in my life I’m unwilling to change in the first place. My sweet friend, Joan, said, Maybe you just can’t [do anything about it] right now. You’ve got lots of stuff going on… You’ll come out of this… then you’ll fix what ails you, a little at a time. She reminded me it’s all about baby steps. Yet, even indecision is a decision. So for now I’ve decided to flounder a bit, “cut myself slack” and indulge in a little selfishness—with my time and energies. To heck with the big girl panties. It’s time for me to stock up on chocolate, wine and paperbacks, and to stop waiting for Someday to arrive in order to start rocking my tutu Today.

How will you live out Today?

Image courtesy of DealDash’s Photos.

Circumnavigating discontent

You could say I’m flailing a bit. At about the same time I dropped everything to visit with family and friends in the Midwest, I also stopped writing every day. Although no correlation, a friend is battling the aftermath of a tragic accident, a close relative is in non-stop pain following surgery, I’m dealing with ongoing medical issues, and in less than six months I’m turning the half century mark and knowing I’m still not where I want to be… but doing what I can to be okay with where I’m at. It’s not that I’m unhappy; it’s that discontent is an ever-present companion. Which brings me to the final chapters in my journey of self-discovery—a 33-day path to my purpose, plan and joy—and I feel a sort of letdown. Because it’s never been about “finding myself,” but rather creating myself by tuning in to what I already possess. And understanding that everyone else we meet is traveling their own path, too.

How do you cimcumnavigate discontent?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Refueling depleted reserves

 

Since I began the practice of Bikram yoga nearly three years ago, many of my posts paint a picture of the takeaways, the lessons learned… mindfulness and a focus on the breath—the present—two recurring themes to carry outside of the hot room. A few days ago, my morning began as a test, or an opportunity, to practice my yoga off the mat. To remain peaceful amidst chaos. My car did not want to start and, when it did, it argued about it until AAA came to the rescue. Eight hours of work, an empty suitcase and last-minute trip plans loomed ahead of me, my flight took off in 24 hours and my adult child still needed her mom. By the time I burst into the yoga studio, I had practiced so much mindfulness throughout the day, my reserve underwent depletion. Thankfully, it only took me an hour to pack after a rock star practice. And I slept like a baby.

How do you refuel depleted reserves?

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A self-help junkie finds simplicity

 

I suppose you could call me a self-help junkie. My latest venture is a 33-day path to purpose, passion & joy through Panache Desai’s book: Discovering Your Soul Signature. In my post, “Dialing down the distractions,” I talk about the benefits of tuning out interruptions. Prior to picking up Desai’s guide, I disconnected from the internet for a short hiatus. Although unplugged for a short time, this exercise in self-control removed a bit of the external chatter to allow me to take a step back and focus inward with fewer diversions. To become more connected with myself. I know I can do all that and still keep up with social media but, as an all-or-nothing type of girl, a fast from Facebook helped me move one step closer to the balance I seek in my life. And it reminded me of an important factor I almost forgot: what simple feels like. I’m excited to see where my new venture guides me.

What does simple feel like to you?

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.