[Image credit: Arvind Balaraman]

Within the past week or so, there has been a marked nihility in my life — a hole that must be filled.  I’ve sought to satisfy this emptiness by surrounding myself with like-minded people (see Dreamers and doers), attending Yoga practice nearly every day, meeting my basic spiritual needs, throwing myself into my day job and writing out goals to advance my writing career.  But the deep nihility remains.  It’s as if a little part of my heart has been excised and I’m waiting to find the missing piece.  The online definition of this noun is nothingness.  Synonyms include void, blank, oblivion and nonexistence.  Yet I continue to seek after the antonyms of capacity and fullness.  I’m not sure what it will take to attain wholeness.  Perhaps each stepping stone toward Someday will bring me closer.  Or maybe it will require the eventual realization of Someday in order to be complete.  All I know is what I’m currently doing is not working.

Is there nihility in your life?